Tag Archives: dialogue

Who Doesn’t Like Cookie Dough?

1 Mar

“Are you telling me that you have never made cookies from scratch?”


“Wow. Does that also mean that you’ve never had cookie dough?”

“Does cookie dough ice cream count?”

“Uh, no. Not hardly.”

“Then that would also be a no.”

“Well, that just can not stand. It’s just not American. We’ll make up a batch of chocolate chip cookie dough and fix this atrocity.”

“I hear you’re not supposed to ’cause of the eggs and stuff.”

“Yeah. That’s why you leave out the eggs and leavening when you’re just going to attack it with a spoon. I’ve done it a hundred times. Uh, with female friends and relatives. Because I would be a total pig if I’d eaten an entire batch my myself. *ahem* C’mon, I’ll show you.”

“If you’re sure.”

“This is really good.”

“You know I’m always right.”

“What about that time you said the cat wouldn’t…”

“Shut up.”

“Always means always.”

“You’re such a dweeb. Eat your cookie dough and be happy I shared my chocolate chip stash with you.”

“Yes, Ma’am.”

“Don’t call me ma’am. I’m not that old.”

“If you say so.”

“I do.”






Christmas Shopping With A Five Year Old – A Flash Fiction

20 Dec

“I told you no.”

“But mommm…”

“Don’t but mom me. We are shopping for Christmas presents for other people, not you. If you keep this up you’re going to lose pizza on the way home. Is that what you want?”

“No! I want pizza.”

“Then stop begging for things, and help me pick something out for your teacher.”

“Something for Mrs. Benson?”



“Because, Charlie, it’s traditional. Now, what do you think she would like? We could get her a pretty scarf, or some earrings, or maybe a gift certificate for a coffee shop.”

“She doesn’t drink coffee.”

“She doesn’t? What does she like to drink?”

“Hot chocolate. Today she had a biiig hot chocolate with a candy cane sticking out of it!”

“Did she get it from a store or make it herself? You’re shrugging. Um, did she throw away her cup when it was empty?”


“What did it look like?”

“It was white.”

“Oh boy. Uh, did it have a brown paper thing around the middle?”


“Yeah. Okay, did it have a drawing on it? Words?”


“I can see the gears turning. Can you remember?”

“It…had a green lady on it.”

“Yes! I know where she got it. We’ll get her a gift card for that place.”

“Okay. Hey, do we have to get presents for all the kids, too?”

“We can if you want.”


“Nn-yes, huh? What should we get them?”

“Tonka Toys!”

“How ’bout something smaller?”


“I meant something less expensive.”

“We could just get a present for one of them.”

“Just one? Which one, Charlie?”


“The Becky who pushed you off the swings last week?”

“She didn’t mean to! She just wanted…”

“Yeah, I know how that goes. What do you think Becky would like?”

“She wants a koala.”

“This is going to be a more interesting shopping trip than I’d thought.”





There’s A Special Island For You – Flash Fiction

14 Dec

“Hey, Mike. How’s the world been treatin’ you this week?”

“It’s been alright. It would be better if my neck would quit seizing up on me.”

“That’s still bothering you? Didn’t the chiropractor say it was tension from sleeping wrong? He even gave you that pillow full of…”

“Well, it worked for a while, but it came back a couple days ago. The pain has kind of migrated a little further down my back, though. You wouldn’t believe how…”

“Yes, I have had some serious pains in the neck in my life. Careful, the signal says ‘Don’t Walk’. How about this beautiful weather we’ve been having. It’s just glorious. I took the family for a picnic over the weekend. Brought the dogs along. The kids loved pitching those balls as far as they could throw them. It’s surprising how long it takes to wear down those terriers. Did you do anything fun this weekend?”

“No. The wife had a honey-do-list as long as my leg. Didn’t even get half of it done. *sigh* Then she drug me out to see the latest Ridger flick.”

“That’s a great movie.”

“It would have been great, except for the teenagers three rows behind us. Kept talking and giggling. I couldn’t concentrate.”

“You have to admit, there’s never that much plot in a Ridger movie. Mostly guns, bad guys, bombs, then him walking out of the rubble with the latest hottie.  Wow, this light is sure taking it’s time.”

“It’s rigged. Did you see that thing in the news that they’ve bombed another…”

“Yeah. Awful. Glad they got the guy this time. Oh, I forgot to tell you, I got the notice about my promotion a few days ago! Move into the new office next Monday.”

“Really. That figures.”

“What figures? I worked my butt off for this position.”

“Yeah. Years. Now they see things not going quite right and want to stick you in to be the fall guy. It’s just a shame that you were there to step into their plans.”

“Ookay. Not quite the way I see it, but…”

“You will soon enough.”

“Yeah, just a sec, I need to make a quick call.”

“Take your time. I’m just standing here waiting to cross the street; aging with every breath.”

“Uh-huh. …  Hey, Bruce, I found another one. … Yeah, persistent. … On the corner of Brooks and Main. … Thanks.”

“What was that about?”

“Nothing much. Just a hotline for when I get into this sort of situation.”

“They have a hotline for slow traffic lights? What’s the number?”

“Eh, not exactly. You see, there’s this company that’s running a series of studies on… Oh, here they come.”

“Wow, prompt.”


“I could do without all the sirens, and the screeching tires.”

“I love them. You can’t miss ’em. … Hi!”

“Were you the gentleman who called about the ‘situation’?”

“I sure am. Right here.”

“Bill, why are you pointing at me?”

“You’re the situation.”

“How can I be ‘the situation’, I’m a person, I…”

“Sir, have you been engaged in a long boring conversation in which you actively attempted to make the other person as miserable as yourself?”

“Whaaa? I don’t see how stating…”

“Have you or have you not had repeated, depressing conversations with anyone who would listen?”

“Now wait just a cotton pickin’ min…”

“And finally, sir, when is the last time something good happened in your life?”


“We need your answer now, sir.”

“It’s kind of hard to talk with people in blast shields and body armor who just poured out of a black van. You do realize that your front right tire is on the curb, right?”

“I see. Then your answer is that you can’t remember at the moment?”

“How can that be taken as…?”

“Thank you for notifying us, Bill. We’ll take it from here.”

“Not a problem, Ma’am.  So long, Mike. You’re going to love it there.”

“Hey! Put me down! NO! You CAN’T do this!”

“You see, they can, Mike. There’s a special island for people like you. A place where they quarantine infectious gloom. You don’t have actual depression, you’re more of a carrier. I’ve tried for years to get a positive word to come out of your mouth. A total waste of time. You just bum people out. I hope you can get through the program quickly. That way we’ll be able to resume our morning chats on our way in to work. It’d be nice hearing something up beat for a change.  See ya!”


“Good Luck!”


Sunset 2 - compressed.




Be Careful Who’s Thoughts You Ask About

25 Oct

How about a dialogue only little story?

Let’s see…


“What are you mumbling about now?”

“Nothing. Just thinking out loud.”

“That’s what I just asked. What are you thinking about?”

“Oh, just some things.”


“Like how come when it’s Halloween it’s all “Oh, look at all the cute kids in their little costumes.”, but then the rest of the year we’re just pests in their way?”

“We’re not exactly little anymore, ya’know.”

“You know what I mean. It’s just… what’s with the duplicity?”

“Ummm, I don’t know.”

“It’s the same kind of thing with Thanksgiving. All year long our culture is full of gimme-gimme, then we take a day or two to suddenly remember all the good things we have. Celebrating all the things we normally take for granted. We get together with all kinds of people we normally dodge, eat four thousand calories each, and then pass out on the couch. It’s almost exactly like Christmas.”

“What about Christmas?”

“That’s another time when we’re all supposed to be happy and stuff. Everyone is in a good mood because it’s the season of giving, but what about the week after that? It’s like the instant Christmas is over everyone is already worried about their New Years resolution and who they’re going to be kissing at midnight. All that fluffy, happy, glowy feeling is just poof gone.”

“Uhhhhh-huh. And your point is?”

“I don’t have a point. You asked me what I was thinking about, so I told you.”

“You sure did.”


Now, hand me my share of the candy, some pumpkin pie

and assure me you’re getting me something awesome for Christmas!


(No, I didn’t set out to preach. All I did was sit down to a blank screen and let my mind barf words all over it. There’s no intention of toe-stepping, or guilt trips.)


Here’s a little Halloween fun from The Muppets:



I think as long as the Carve-O-Matic was used correctly it could really come in handy this time of year. Too bad Beaker got it.


Poor little guy.


I wonder if he’s just like Kenny and they have a huge lab of clones just for such a purpose?




Will I Ever Be Worthy?

14 May

I was reminded about The Thin Man series on Friday. My Aunt and I were talking about William Powell (after watching My Man Godfrey), how much we like his acting and the roles he chose.

This got me wondering if I would ever be good enough to have written lines for him.  He was, and still is, famous for his one line zingers. Do I have the kind of raw talent that would have been needed to show him at his best?

Here are some of the snappy lines from The Thin Man.

Now, I don’t know how many of these lines were in the book before it became the script that they worked from, how many were added to the script, and how many of these little treasures were ad-libs between two actors who were comfortable friends.

All I know is that perhaps it wouldn’t be a bad idea to have William Powell say my fun/quirky/ironic male dialogue back to me (in my head, of course) before I commit to keeping it in any of my works. Who knows, maybe that habit will get me a movie deal some day.

A girl can dream, can’t she? 😉