Well, Hello again.
Have you had the kind of week I just experienced?
On Wednesday afternoon I had just decided that the fever was gone and I could resume my regular activities, when an uncle called to tell me that my last Great-grandparent had peacefully passed away at about 12:30pm.
Then there was that horrible shooting in Connecticut a day later, and a couple other sad things relayed to me by my husband that evening. Cried myself to sleep.
The next day was a niece’s Princess themed birthday party, which I was very late to, because I had to wait for a migraine to subside before going anywhere near excited toddlers. It was a good party, though. She had many friends and relatives attend, and received tons of toys, including a pink Schwinn tricycle, and a Cinderella Pez dispenser. Kind of a toss up as to which one she liked better, really. One gives you sugar, the other lets you go fast. Eh, why not both?
Then Sunday morning, as we were sitting in church, the children were called up to help sing a song. It was so hard not to cry, for oh, so many reasons. The service was wonderful, though.
So now, I am in something of a stunned, reflective mood. Not sure what I’m reflecting on. Perhaps it’s the fact that at least my Great-grandmother was most way through her 90’s. That I’m glad she had a good life, full of love and family, a quiet passing, and many people who will remember her fondly.
Maybe it’s the fact that I’m glad I have lots of family. No, I do not have 12 first cousins and 50 second cousins, but compared to some people, I do have many in my life whom I consider to be family, loved ones, friends who are so close they are treated as brothers, sister, spare fathers and mothers, aunts and uncles. They do not take away from the love I have for my biological family. If anything, they help magnify the love I have for everyone who makes my life special.
This Christmas will be difficult in some ways. This year I have lost a grandmother, and a great-grandmother, the World has spent this last year just getting crazier and crazier, and we are still not financially stable enough for children.
However, this Christmas will be wonderful in many ways: my nephews are now big enough to open their presents with little to no help; we may all be going through tight financial times, but we will still all get together, giving perhaps a few more gifts that are ‘needed’ rather than just ‘wanted’; the loss of loved ones seems to amplify my awareness of the need to love now, to tell the ones I have that they are special, wanted, and thought of; watching the snow fall outside it’s also crystal clear that I am thankful for a warm house, hot food to eat, and a wonderful husband to curl up with on cold nights.
Perhaps it’s the low blood sugar making me sappy, but when I really think about it, I have much to be thankful for in my life. I realize that the ‘traditional’ time to be thankful was last month, but it’s so very important to see, and acknowledge what you have now. If you don’t learn to be comfortable with little, then you will never be content with more, no matter how much ‘more’ you acquire.
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I have, unfortunately, done almost no writing this week.
There have been a couple additions to my book ideas folder. Perhaps an anthology or two, with the help of a few relatives, would be in order.
I have been reading my mother’s romance novel, although admittedly I have been slacking on that project as well. Not for lack of interest. Far from it, I can hardly wait to find out who is causing so much trouble and pain, and to see how the main love interests finally get together, and to discover what becomes of all the eligible bachelors who’ve come out of the woodwork.
Perhaps taking my vitamins on a regular basis will help with this lackadaisical feeling. I should also start taking walks again. Maybe if I start taking care of myself the way I should some of the fog will lift from my brain, and some of the lead will drop from my…tush.
Doing it will be the only way to find out. I guess now that I’ve told you it had better start getting done, huh? Down coat, and ear muffs, here I come! After I take this multivitamin, that is.
Until Next Time…
So, what has been your overall mood this month, so far? Have you been looking forward to Christmas? Or dreading it because of the memories it will dredge up? A strange mix of the two?
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What is on your Christmas list? Example: I would like an Amazon gift card, a Wizard 101 cash card, decaffeinated English Breakfast tea, a small jar of Stevia powder, almonds, pepitas, lots of big hugs, my back popped by my youngest sister, mashed potatoes and gravy, and some help putting together a cover for my book of poetry.
Tags: A Holiday, book, broke, Family, husband, life, My Mother, sisters, Thankful